July 14, 2008

Self-Induced Guilt Trip

I am struggling with guilt. I am making myself feel guilty for trying to do my job well and be good to my body and my baby.

Being an event planner requires some sacrifices- skipping meals to attend to your guests, lifting heavy boxes, traveling away from home, being on your feet for long periods of time, keeping your composure when attendees become angry, and then some. Although I am sure lots of other jobs face this daily, we event planners face it in a crunched time frame when sleep deprivation and stress levels are high.

I have been feeling this crunch a lot over the past two weeks. Mind you, my employers are wonderful, my coworkers are understanding, my staff is supportive, but my own mind feels guilty.

I feel like each time I turn around I am telling my employer that I can't lift this box, I need a true lunch break on the staff schedule, I can't travel to this meeting, I'll miss this conference call, and the list goes on.

I appreciate Rosie and her "We Can Do It" attitude- I just need my mind to get wrapped around the concept. I welcome thoughts from other people struggling with this balance. How do I convince myself it is okay to do less than 100% of my job in order to have a healthy pregnancy and baby?

5 comments:

Billye said...

Anna,
I am really no help to you, I coached Basketball game the night before Landry was born! Do what you feel like doing. If you feel good take advantage of those days and slack on the others! No one minds an occasional slacker, we all mind an all the time slacker!
Billye

The McKnight's said...

Hi Anna, My name is Kristi. I worked with Billye and she told me about your blog! You and i are in the same point in our pregnancy. I am also 17 weeks. IF my memory serves me right, Billye told me that her friend (you) was pregnant the same day i told her i was! I understand how you feel. I have been off all summer so the whole work guilt hasn't kicked in, but we are in the process of selling and moving out of our house, and i feel so bad for my husband and family because i too can't lift boxes, stand on ladders, i need lots of breaks...you name it. I feel like i am not helping enough! We just need to keep in mind that our body right now is not ours...it is the babies! This pregnancy will be over soon enough and we will get our bodies back...until then, enjoy the no lifting, long lunch breaks, and extra naps! We will miss all of that! It's nice to read your blog! I had a sono today and i am having a GIRL!!!
kristi mcknight

Anonymous said...

Dear Anna, I know I have told you this before. Just think of Mary riding 100 miles on a donkey in the bitter cold. You are blessed. Now, get back to work. You can sleep in 20 years like the rest of us. Hee. Hee. Love you! Alison

Melissa said...

Don't worry. . .the guilt begins to fade once you can't do things because of your enormous belly or swollen feet! Besides, in my experience, people would get mad at me for lifting things or standing on ladders. I think most people - especially women -understand that you're not being lazy. Try to not worry about it as much. I felt guilty about not being as hands on with my 22 little ones during the school year, but even they would understand why I had to sit with my feet up instead of sitting on the floor or walking around. They would even remind me that it's what pregnant women do when I would have to go to the restroom for the 13th time that day. I say take advantage of it!!

Meet the Boyd's said...

Anna,

You and I are both event planners. We eat sleep and breathe it. To miss a meeting or to actually have to sit down for lunch virtually kills us because there is something to be done and quite frankly we would do it best. But let me tell you this…I was a pregnant event planner once too. I learned the hard way that pushing yourself to much can be unhealthy. (To the tune of a month and a half of bed rest). Look at this time in your life as an opportunity to finally have the right to slow down. You have earned this right and MOST importantly your baby has earned it. Think about it like this. Even when you are not “working” your body is currently “working” at making a baby. And you must give that baby fuel to work with (meaning more food). Enjoy the opportunity to sleep more, eat on a regular basis, and have others carry those heavy boxes. I just might get pregnant again so I can get away with having a lunch break at MEGA Camp…then again maybe not. 

Storm

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