Three months ago, I quit my job. Kinda. Here is a timeline of God's movement in my life over the last few months...
The day I took this picture was the same day I started praying about quitting my job. It was once a dream. Then, I had to start traveling again and I thought about that dream more and more.
December 2010: While in Lubbock, I had dinner with a friend and we were discussing a recent girls weekend. I mentioned not feeling like I myself and feeling the distance between myself and my friends. We discussed what I meant and why I hadn't brought it up. One of the things that come from that conversation was my desire to jump off the career ladder and how I related to many of my other friends in that position. We cried together and I know she prayed for me from that night on.
March 1, 2011: My bible verse for the next two weeks, "Be Still and Know that I am God." How divinely fitting- sit back and let me show you. Listen and I'll tell you something wonderful. Don't do it all yourself. Leave me room to be miraculous. I picked this verse not knowing how much I would rely on it.
March 4, 2011: I broke down emotionally during a meeting at work about billing. Who cries about billing, especially when it isn't your money? That would be me. Our accountant abruptly called the meeting to a close. My CEO asked to speak to me- I couldn't fully process what was happening. I left quickly for lunch and cried for an entire hour on the phone with Marcus in the Wendy's parking lot. I couldn't take it any more- I wasn't doing the job I loved and my sweet girl was growing up in daycare. The combination was too much- God had been whispering and now he was yelling at me. I couldn't kick and scream anymore.
That afternoon I went and chopped my hair off before having dinner with 4 friends that night. God put them in my life that day to reassure me. I hadn't seen two of them in MONTHS. Three of the four work from home or quit successful careers to be successful Moms. The other announced she was pregnant. I could see God's love throughout the evening.
I stayed up late that night processing everything in Excel. I needed to see the numbers. They told me I needed to work, but not nearly as much as I thought. I began writing a proposal to my employer- let me do one part of my job, from home, part time for a small portion of my salary.
March 7: I wanted to see what options I had. One of the friends from dinner on March 4th discussed some real estate work she was doing. So, I called a friend in real estate and asked him if there was an opportunity. We met for lunch on March 7th. He told me what a "God send" and "an answered prayer" my call was. We started developing a plan for me to work for his team of 4 real estate agents to be a virtual and marketing assistant.
March 11: I played a little game with God- I was honestly so scared. Show me "this" loud and clear and I'll know "this" is a valid opportunity. He showed it to me in a big way.
March 14: Saw a Christian Mom tweet about "this is the job God has chosen for me". I knew that tweet was for me. I suddenly felt so reassured- God wants this for my family and He can move mountains to make it happen. I can move dirt. I can't see how big this is, but He can. I felt a peace- even if my employer says no, God is saying yes to the overall plan and He will work out the details.
March 15: My new Bible verse for the remainder of the month was picked with this whole life change in mind, "Stand firm in your Faith. Be courageous. Be strong." It has helped me to stop thinking of all the what ifs and just trust that when in accordance with God's Will, you are under his wing and he will protect and provide.
March 18: I rarely see my CEO- he is at the capitol most days. Since we had a meeting on this day, I knew it was the best day to talk with him. I shared my proposal and demotion request. He smiled and kept saying that he understood. He is a father of 2 small children with a wife that stays home. He also had taken a bigger role in our organization recently- very similar to my situation. He asked for time to process and that he'd get back to me quickly.
March 22: I got the call on this day that my employer was open to my proposal and that we could talk more the following week to work out the kinks. We agreed August was the best time to make the change- it works well for us in many ways, including financial. We can start living with the restraints that will come from my new position to make the transition easier. All that extra money- can pay off 2 small credit cards I want to eliminate before I lose my income. In God's detailing, the amount extra we can pay to the card between now and then, is just $17 short of the total. More reassurance!
March 23: I hinted about my news on Facebook- mainly to let all my prayers warriors know the good news and my Dad and Jacque called wanting to know what the message meant. They were coming over for dinner the following night, so I really had planned to tell them then. But, sitting on my bathtub in the dark, I shared my secret with them. I was honestly most nervous to tell my Dad than anyone. I knew how much going to college and having a good job meant to him. I was so relieved when he told me it was a good surprise and that he was proud of me. Another reassurance that this was for the best.
Over the next month, I shared my plan with a few prayer partners and just asked them to pray for guidance, confidence, and faith. I have wanted this for so long. I have used so many things to try and make working and schooling Abby feel right and it just never has. My motivation at work is low. My mornings with Abby were getting sadder. She suddenly became a Momma's girl after being all about her Daddy for 2 years. It was just more reassurance.
April 25: The day after Easter, Abby is accidentally given a peanut while at school and goes into anaphylactic shock. As scary as it was, it also told me that we can't control her environment when we are not there. No matter how much everyone else is watching out for her- she needs her parents. I was so grateful to have this plan already in place when this happened.
During the month of May, we spent time tweaking our budget. Cutting expenses out, learning to shop at Wal-Mart and learning that the Great Value brand is just that, a great value! I've taken extra cash and we've purchased items we know we will need in the fall just to help ease the burden of a reduced income. I have purchased things for so long to make me happy that I am honestly excited to change direction and enjoy my time more than my things. During all this tweaking, God also showed us more income in three different ways that will give us a safety net in the fall. Honestly, He has shown Himself in this decision more than in anything I've ever witnessed, including IVF. I stand in awe!
So, what will I be doing and what is Abby doing when this takes effect? I'll share those details soon! It is a fun adventure for us both!